Faggots & Iron

Oh brother do I have a stitch from laughing so hard...

I was in this conversation with my brother where he was going on about his wife being anaemic and having low blood pressure. Of course me being me, I was doing 2 other different things while he was going on about michelle and the doctors. Every minute or two, i'd chime in with give her more iron...forget the meds which the doc had prescribed and go natural...spinach and greens babes!

All of a sudden the word "faggot" jumped off my screen. Was he seriously asking me if I knew what that meant? Err yes Shawn, that's a very derogatory term for male homosexuals. And of course working for the World Bank we have to be so very politically correct in the terms that we use...ahem!

Ok, there was a momentary silence from his end. And then i read, "I don't think they have 9mg of iron and i most certainly will not be feeding that to my wife"...oh shite what were we going on about??? By this time he has googled it up and sent me the definition and here it is for your consumption...be fair warned:

Faggot is a kind of meatball, a traditional dish in the UK. It is made from meat off-cuts and offal (guess i now have to go google this!!), especially pork. A faggot is traditional made from pig heart, liver and fat belly meat or bacon minced together, with herbs added for flavoring and sometimes breadcrumbs. The mixture is shaped in the hand into balls, wrapped round with caul (a membrane from the pig's abdomen) , and baked.

Needless to say i laughed so hard and it still brings a chuckle when i think of the conversation. Hope it atleast brought a smile to your face :D

I Shall Not Tell A Lie

I shall not tell a lie.........

Friendship is; A ten letter word, But, it means so much more.

A friend is; a friendly companion, But there is more beyond the meaning.
To have a friend, effects you, entirely.
But, to have a true friend, effects your whole being and entire life.

Having a true friend is someone who can take the chaos away from your mind,..
And the sorrow from your heart.
Who can be functionally dysfunctional with you.
Who can pick you off the floor and see what is worth living for.

A fake friend, will do anything to make you fall on your face and laugh when you are walked on. Or ravage in your tears, and pretend that their lies mean well, but really smile on the inside.

But to be a real friend, they cry with you and are torn apart by every tear that adds to the puddle.

Who else can you go to after you have had a day that broke you entirely....
And you can explain it all to them
Not even have to finish your sentence,
Because they understand you completely. True friendship is when you can share stories, be real with each other and have a piece of each others heart, when they are more than family.

You don't choose your family,
You choose your friends.
The friend makes the man.
Who your friends are controls; who you are, what you do, How you react to abrupt situations.

Friends effect your sanity and in some cases insanity when your around things that disrupt your daily life; Friends, enemies, drama, a bad day or a bad hair day. Without the near perfect friend, you are not a whole person.

I shall not tell a lie.

The Value of Friendship

I recently found myself in a predicament as to whether I should call a halt to a friendship or not. Granted it was not a 26yr old one but one which was just a little over half a year. Sure some would say, "Hey 7 mths only what, no big deal. You couldn't have formed a meaningful friendship as yet !". And in most instances I'd agree, just because as those who know me would know that I don't take things seriously and am pretty much as happy-go-lucky as they come :) Easily handled therefore you'd think...delete, block, ignore and move on...hhmmm...so why the predicament?

Sigh...in my head a bond was formed, blind trust in things which was said/told was introduced and unquestioning faith came into play. Although initially demanded, at the end freely given.

So a couple of weeks ago, I find out some things about said friend. And as the days progressed, even more was revealed. In my head, one word was hammering against the walls of my skull...liar! liar! liar!...but i decided to give him the benefit of doubt as I thought friends ought to. We had an agreement that should either of us have doubts or questions about the other, we would put forth our queries to the other. So I asked about some of those things which I had been told and the come back was that they were good stories. Doubts have now been cast further a field. It became a he said/she said situation, where I was ready to pull my already thining hair out!

Things have gotten progressively worse, other parties are now involved. I made the mistake of voicing my 2cents on some of his actions with these external parties and lo and behold it made its way back to him...what a freakin mess

I don't claim to be innocent or blame free in all this, but the intention behind my own actions were never malicious. As I mentioned, other parties are involved but somehow I get the distinct impression that he has targeted his energies on me. Two days straight of being lambasted. He knows I care for him, he knows me better than some long standing friends, he has gone behind my walls, so why does he not put this knowledge in deciphering that I would not "be out to bring him down" or "destroy him"? I'm still that happy-go-lucky, fun loving person who has no hang ups or hidden agenda. I wouldn't even know where to start...hey! this is me, the same person who has watched the furry hairballs called rabbits eat her prized ferns for the past month and not done a thing about it. All talk of rabbit stew is just that - talk!

So where am I? Angry? yes; Disappointed? yes; Sad? yes; Exhausted? very much so. Did I ask for this? I'd like to think not, but then again sometimes things workout in mysterious ways. Did my inquisitive nature get me to this point? Maybe, but does that mean I'm vindictive? Hell no! I will let you know however that I have apologised to make peace and No, I have no idea if it has been accepted :)

It's always been said that writing things down is therapeutic, and i can vouch that it sure is. I now end this piece with a light hearted quote on friendship:

"I noticed your hostility towards him...I ought to have guessed you were friends!"
- Malcolm Bradbury

Digging Into My Reserve

I've been sitting and staring at this blank page for a while now, whilst a whole range of emotions curse through my veins...anger, annoyance, disbelief and well you get the drift...

By this point in my career i pretty much think I've seen and heard it all, until this afternoon. Wake up Chermaine, guess you're still guillable! Haven't you learned your lesson about trusting people blindly? That black is never just black? And when someone says this is P&C and I will never breathe a word about this topic to anyone, in most likelihood the intention has already been there to disclose said information?....sigh!

So anyways, I'm sitting here reading this case file and thinking, what an eejit! Two colleagues involved in a he say/she say battle which solely isn't an issue between them but clearly involves at least 3 other external parties. One of whom is very quiet and the other 2 a little more vocal. In the entire problem involving 5 people, there seems to be an underlying thread whereby one of the 5 is clearly the catalyst. Now 5 individuals is a mega problem as this can be the downfall of an entire unit. Invasion of privacy issues are up in the air, cheating, lying...wow! and they say that HR is a boring job.

But as in any company, no matter which way you cut it, ultimately it is HR which is blamed for the problem. Lack of proactiveness, not chosing sides, not giving solutions that would aid and abet said individuals....tired, exhausted, overwhelmed, I once again wonder why I got into this profession. Wouldn't IT have been a safer bet? To deal with computers (non thinking, non feeling instruments) as opposed to humans (the so-called assests of an organization)

I'll shut down my computer in a while, close my office door and dig deep into my 15yrs of experience as to how I should handle this problem. Hey after all I did tell my Manager that I love case management. What's that saying now?? .... ah! Becareful what you wish for because it may just bite u in your arse....

Do you know the me I know?

This past week and a bit has been a pretty surreal one. I’ve come into information that I did not really want or need to know, been put in a situation where a lot depended on how quickly I reacted and laughed till my sides were in stitches. So what is the purpose of telling u this? Well in the process of all these happenings, I’ve learned or re-learned a few things about myself, which I’ve decided to share, so here’s my list…

Oh, oh , oh before that I do have to tell you what I learned about Dr. Seuss, the blue egg, green egg (was there a red egg too?) dude. Theodore Seuss Geisel, aka Dr. Seuss dropped out of college before receiving his PhD. The pseudonym Dr. Seuss was perhaps wishful thinking on his part. But hey what the heck, the man made his millions. Now what does that tell you about busting your butt to get those paper certificates which you either keep stuffed in a drawer somewhere or is sitting pristinely in a frame on your office wall?

Okey so slight digression there, which by the way I seem to be doing a fair bit of lately. The list already, Chermaine, get with it…

1. I still have my temper :D
2. I’ve a really whacky sense of humor which was lost temporarily but is now back in full force
3. I enjoy a good verbal sparring
4. I don’t take too kindly to being lied to. Honesty is top most on my list
5. I am obsessed with chocolate covered godiva strawberries and mangoes
6. Intimidating me will get you no where
7. If I say I trust you, value it. If it waivers and dips, it’s gone
8. I have walls built against walls and all for good reasons
9. I can’t and won’t change so don’t bother making me your cause
10. I love speed only if I am behind the wheel. Must be the need for me to feel like I am in control of my life and where it is going AND
11. I learned the new buzz word in DC…bitchassness

So there you have it. A little insight into c’est moi

Aimless Ponderings

Ah, the many mysterious questions life poses! Where have we come from? Where are we going? Whay are we here? And most important of all, is it really illegal to kill a preying mantis?

The world is full of oddities requiring anecdotal explanations. Pondering the little things keeps us out of the trouble we tend to get into when we are poking into the big things. For instance, the next time you find yourself boiling up into a stew over the latest political scandal, why not take a moment to consider why is a score of zero in tennis called "love"? (for lack of something more exciting to think about)

So since I got you thinking about it, here's an explanation: I'm assuming that this tennis term is not very lovely for the players. But, no matter; the word's origin has nothing at all to do with amore. Love is really a distortion of the French word oeuf, which means egg, as in goose egg. Love is definitely a kinder way of refering to zero points than goose egg.

Alright , I now go on to ponder if Dr. Seuss is really a doctor...

Delirium

Blackness, darkness, icy starkness
Stalk you, hound you and surround you.
Sinking sadness, growing madness
Blur your senses, break your fences.

Lightning, thunder, come and plunder
Come destroy us when we're joyous.
Misfortune sow, and shower woe
Till we're blighted and benighted.

Silence, silence, deathly silence!
Cries of pain rise up in vain.
No one hears, no help appears,
Only silence, lonesome silence.

Begone! Away! You cannot stay!
I love my gloom and empty room.
The faintest light would numb my sight.
I live in night, I am the night.

The Examined Life is No Picnic

I have come to realize that I already know most of what's necessary to live a meaningful life - that it isn't all that complicated. I know it. And have known it for a long, long time. Living it - well, that's another matter.

All I really need to know about how to live and what to do and how to be I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate school mountain, but there in the sandpit at school.

These are the things I learned:

Share everything.
Play fair.
Don't hit people.
Put things back where you found them.
Clean up your own mess.
Don't take things that aren't yours.
Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
Wash your hands before you eat.
Flush.
Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
Live a balanced life - learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
Take a nap every afternoon.
When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.
Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are like that.
Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die. So do we.
And then remember the Dick and Jane books and the first word you learned - the biggest word of all - LOOK