It Only Takes A Second

My head is throbbing. I can't move my head. My eyes feel like there's pressure being forced on it and it hurts. Every time I breathe in there are sharp pains. As I feel my body I also realize there is a quietness around me. I hear people talking in hushed voices and closer yet is the hum of a machine with the occasional "beeps". Where the hell am I and what has happened to my body that it feels like a block of cement?

I slowly pry my eyes open and shut them tightly again quickly. Surely I'm hallucinating! I cannot be lying in a hospital. And for the love of God why? I've had an exhausting basketball match and am lying in my bed at home thinking that I've been put through the drill, correct? Yup, that's what it is.

I sigh a huge relief and feel myself drifting back to sleep, when SMACK WHAM BAM! it hits me.

You know in that song "In a New York minute everything can change", well what about in a second, can everything change in a second? It's very little time to work with. It's here and gone in literally a blink of an eye. However, I think 1 single second is enough time to make a difference. So for me, yes, everything can change in a second.

If you don't believe me that the world can change in a second, then think about this. It only takes a second for a car to lose control on the road and swerve into the Semi. It only takes a second, for the Semi to slam on the brakes and skid on black ice. It only takes a second for that truck to slam into the SUV next to it. It only takes a second to see your friend look at u & gasp his last breath of life. And another second to see your life flash before you and you lose consciousness. In that short amount of time all those things are possible.

I want to scream but there's no voice. I want to cry but there's no tears. I want to rewind time but even that can't be done. I am wrecked with grief for the loss of two dear friends and am haunted by the look of fear I saw in John's eyes and his warm smile which bade me goodbye as he looked at me in the rear view mirror seconds before the Semi hit our SUV head on, flipping the vehicle open and then again smashing into the side. I saw blood, lots and lots of blood and my life flash before my eyes before an eerie sense of nothingness took over me.

Now, I just lie here waiting for when I can go home to my sanctuary. I am but a block of cement...cold, emotionless, detached...

...tired...sleepy...goodnight...goodbye!